Dear Future Jasmine,
Hey girl!!! How are YOU doing today??? Chances are you are not doing so great, which is why you are reading this letter. Because it is being written to remind you of some majorly happy feelings that you have right now!!! There is no way to bottle the amazing feelings of today so instead I am writing them down for you so you will remember them!!! So here we go...
-remember that time when you played in the starting jam of the season opener for your roller derby team, yeah girl that happened, the coach chose YOU to be in that line up because he trusted you and he knew what you could do, because you my dear, are awesome!!!
-remember when the line you were in held the opposing jammer and your teams jammer got lead, first jam of the night, yeah girl that happened to you and your team!!!!
-remember how you felt when our coach and teammates trusted you with the star because they had the faith in you to score points, yeah girl it happened to YOU!!!
-remember that jam where you broke thru first and got lead jammer then called it before the other team could score points...yes girl YOU did that!!!
-remember that jam where you jumped the freaking apex and landed it!!!!! Yes girl all those practice jumps helped and all that visualization helped, yes girl YOU did that!!!!
-remember when you were standing on the line to jam and the other team was warning each other that you were super strong and they needed to be ready...yes girl they were talking about YOU!!!!
-remember that jam when you were coming around turn 4 and Titz Mcghee tried to take you out Skully/Blue/Gory style on lane 4 and you juked her and took lane 1...yes girl YOU did that!!
-remember when your coach asked you to spend more time backward and you did, yes girl YOU are strong enough to do that!!!!
-remember how much your teammates cheered for you, and how much they love you, not just because you did something awesome but because you are their derby sister, yes girl they love YOU!!!
-but most of all remember that none of this would be possible without your amazing coaches and team/league mates. They push you, hit you, juke you, so you will be stronger the next time.
Future Jasmine, remember these things on those days when it seems like nothing you do is enough and when you come home from having a crappy practice, and feeling like you suck. YOU DO NOT, you are awesome, and everyone has crappy days. But you are doing amazing things and making amazing strides!!! Keep it up girl, the cream rises to the top and you are on your way. It might be a helluva long journey yet, but you have taken some major steps toward your future awesomeness!!! I love you girl, and so do your friends and family!!!
xoxo
Love always
Past Jasmine
Sunday, March 8, 2015
Wednesday, September 3, 2014
Early morning ramblings.....Roller Derby Fresh Meat
Dear Fresh Meat,
Thank you so much for joining our league! I am so glad you finally took that plunge, to try something "completely crazy" and put wheels on your feet to learn a new sport! You may not realize this now, but all us veterans have been exactly where you are! We were new girls, whose families either supported us 100 million percent, or they were scared for us, or didn't understand, but trusted us anyway. We were all excited when we laced up those skates, and strapped on that safety gear. Don't forget the mouthguard :-). I was so happy to see you all last night trying those hard things over and over again. It makes my heart happy to see you all. I believe you are doing one of the most important things you can do for yourself on earth. There are things you will learn about yourself, sides to yourself you never knew you had. There is a fierce side of you that is on its way out and once it gets out, your life will change. And inevitably there will come a time when someone will try to cage your fierce beast. DO NOT LET THEM!!! Do not get bogged down by anyone in this world, or by the politics of roller derby. And in my opinion there is only one way to stay out of that bog, and that is to be the one to constantly help build up your derby sisters. You are not here to compete with anyone but yourself. Be better tomorrow than you were today, fall trying something new, then get up and try again until you don't fall anymore. Encourage your sisters, always, because that's what we are my friends sisters. The moment you strapped on those skates, you became my sister, and I love my sisters!!!! So again, thank you freshies, meat, rollerbabies, thank you for joining my derby family, our derby family. Love, Slugs, and bruisess.
Gypsy Girl
Thank you so much for joining our league! I am so glad you finally took that plunge, to try something "completely crazy" and put wheels on your feet to learn a new sport! You may not realize this now, but all us veterans have been exactly where you are! We were new girls, whose families either supported us 100 million percent, or they were scared for us, or didn't understand, but trusted us anyway. We were all excited when we laced up those skates, and strapped on that safety gear. Don't forget the mouthguard :-). I was so happy to see you all last night trying those hard things over and over again. It makes my heart happy to see you all. I believe you are doing one of the most important things you can do for yourself on earth. There are things you will learn about yourself, sides to yourself you never knew you had. There is a fierce side of you that is on its way out and once it gets out, your life will change. And inevitably there will come a time when someone will try to cage your fierce beast. DO NOT LET THEM!!! Do not get bogged down by anyone in this world, or by the politics of roller derby. And in my opinion there is only one way to stay out of that bog, and that is to be the one to constantly help build up your derby sisters. You are not here to compete with anyone but yourself. Be better tomorrow than you were today, fall trying something new, then get up and try again until you don't fall anymore. Encourage your sisters, always, because that's what we are my friends sisters. The moment you strapped on those skates, you became my sister, and I love my sisters!!!! So again, thank you freshies, meat, rollerbabies, thank you for joining my derby family, our derby family. Love, Slugs, and bruisess.
Gypsy Girl
Tuesday, September 2, 2014
morning ramblings.....body loving = body shaming
disclaimer: this is being typed on my phone, excuse spelling and grammatical errors please!!!
Its early in the morning, I am sitting in the parking lot at my church while my oldest is in early morning seminary. I am listening to Kidd Kraddick In The Morning, and occasionally there is a music break. Well during the last one, my local radio station played that super cute song "All About That Bass", I love this song for a lot of reasons, one of which is how stinking cute the gal is who sings it, and how as a non "stick figure silicone Barbie doll", even when I am at a healthy weight, I am in love with the message. Then I thought about my daughter. She IS skinny, she will always be a skinny, tiny girl. She is shaped just like her grandmother and great grandmothers, both of who had an 18 inch waist. And I began to think, and worry that my love for this song, which leads to a conversation about weight and size and what men want etc, may someday have a negative effect on her self esteem. I am not saying folks should not love their bodies, but there is a line in the song that says, "my mama said boys like a little more booty to hold at night", what future effects could that statement have on my daughter? I started to think about how I should not make such a big deal about being fat, round, soft, bootylicious, curvy etc. I just had a baby, and am very physically uncomfortable with my leftover baby weight, I am exercising so its going away, but still, I don't like it, so I am not a "love my out of shape body" type person. But it got me thinking, that there are people out there, who love their curves to the point of making girls who are thin, feel like boys won't like them because of claims that men don't want a bone to hold at night etc. I don't ever want my daughter to feel there is anything wrong with being thin. And I am feeling super guilty for going on about this song the other day. I guess my point is, body loving is sometimes shaming on someone else. Love your body for sure, but don't be a cause of pain for someone else by implying that a man wont like a woman who is opposite your body type. I have had the unique opportunity this morning to see this from both sides. Just a thought. Happy Tuesday!!!
Its early in the morning, I am sitting in the parking lot at my church while my oldest is in early morning seminary. I am listening to Kidd Kraddick In The Morning, and occasionally there is a music break. Well during the last one, my local radio station played that super cute song "All About That Bass", I love this song for a lot of reasons, one of which is how stinking cute the gal is who sings it, and how as a non "stick figure silicone Barbie doll", even when I am at a healthy weight, I am in love with the message. Then I thought about my daughter. She IS skinny, she will always be a skinny, tiny girl. She is shaped just like her grandmother and great grandmothers, both of who had an 18 inch waist. And I began to think, and worry that my love for this song, which leads to a conversation about weight and size and what men want etc, may someday have a negative effect on her self esteem. I am not saying folks should not love their bodies, but there is a line in the song that says, "my mama said boys like a little more booty to hold at night", what future effects could that statement have on my daughter? I started to think about how I should not make such a big deal about being fat, round, soft, bootylicious, curvy etc. I just had a baby, and am very physically uncomfortable with my leftover baby weight, I am exercising so its going away, but still, I don't like it, so I am not a "love my out of shape body" type person. But it got me thinking, that there are people out there, who love their curves to the point of making girls who are thin, feel like boys won't like them because of claims that men don't want a bone to hold at night etc. I don't ever want my daughter to feel there is anything wrong with being thin. And I am feeling super guilty for going on about this song the other day. I guess my point is, body loving is sometimes shaming on someone else. Love your body for sure, but don't be a cause of pain for someone else by implying that a man wont like a woman who is opposite your body type. I have had the unique opportunity this morning to see this from both sides. Just a thought. Happy Tuesday!!!
Sunday, May 4, 2014
Why so secretive......
Ok, I have a few minutes so I am sitting down to answer the burning question you all have...why did I stay so tight lipped on social media about my pregnancy with Ender. Well, it's a very long story, but as they say, begin at the beginning and go on until you get to the end, so here goes.
Last year, after I graduated from college, a year ago today actually ^_^, Jacob and I got this hair brained idea to have another kid. So we thru caution to the wind and a couple of weeks later, I was pregnant. I was excited, apprehensive, nervous, etc etc...but I was also thinking, that something just wasn't quite right, I could not put my finger on it, but I knew something felt a little off. In fact when I told the head of the training committee of my roller derby league that I was going to be off skates, I asked her not to say anything to non-essential folks because, something felt weird. So I was being cautious, I only told the gals in my carpool because, I was riding with them, so obviously they would be all "ummm Gypsy why aren't you skating" even though all derby girls know that if a team mate suddenly shows up to practice off skates, it can only be one injury...the blessed 9 month injury ^_^. So I continued life, went to derby and even danced at the Mirage a time or two. We were getting ready to move in July, and we also had to drive out to Nebraska for Jacob's grandma's funeral. Well, on June 11, I started bleeding. We went to the ER, they did an ultrasound, and everything was fine, at that point, baby had a strong heart beat, but my placenta was bleeding. They told me it may stop, or it may be the beginning of a miscarriage. So I was scared. It was sad to me that I was going to possibly lose my baby. So we went home, and I laid down and watched "what to expect when you are expecting", and about half way thru the movie, I started having contractions, because that is what it is ladies and gents, contractions, not cramps or pain, its labour, and then there was A LOT of blood. I was bleeding for a few days before I could get into see the doctor again, they did another ultrasound, and my little baby that was alive and well just days before, was gone. All I saw was a screen with an empty womb. Now I have studied science, and I am religious, but neither one of those could prepare me for the sadness I felt when I realized what had happened to me. Logically I knew it was a "good" thing. Miscarriage is the body's way of aborting a pregnancy when there is something wrong with the early development of a fetus. I was about 7 weeks along when I had my miscarriage. But the emptiness I felt was beyond imaginable. But lucky for me, I have great friends, and a great family who helped me through it. I got up, and got on with my life. I was sad, my kids were sad because we had told them, but I was being strong for them and for me.
We packed and moved...and that is another story altogether that I AM NOT getting into right now lol.
We got to San Antonio and I met my new roller derby team, I started going to practice and everything was getting normal again. My body leveled out, really quickly actually, it was only a month after my miscarriage that things got back to normal. But August came, and my period did not......and I was like...WHAT is going on???? I was on all sorts of blogs and forums looking for information about why I would skip a period after a miscarriage. Finally the madness went on long enough, I told Jacob I thought I might be pregnant, I took a test...several actually. And they were all positive. And I was scared. I went to the doctor to get a prescription refilled a few days later, and I told him I suspected I was pregnant and he had me do a blood test. When I was at the pharmacy picking up the prescription the pharmacist handed me info about the meds that said in HUGE BOLD LETTERS....DO NOT TAKE WHILE PREGNANT. I had been taking this medicine for a while, I took it during the pregnancy I lost, and also during this current one. I asked the pharmacist what could possibly happen and he rattled off a list of things including miscarriage and birth defects. Well needless to say I didn't ever take another pill, and I began panicking that day.
I went to the OB and was seeing an attending physician, which in the army is a big deal, mostly you will see residents or midwives but because of the medication I had been on I saw an attending, and he was awesome, he and his resident were amazing. I saw them on a Tuesday, they did an ultrasound, and dated me at 6 weeks pregnant, I went back the next week, they did another ultrasound and the baby had grown ^_^ so they were optimistic that it would be fine. I however was not. I was scared to death. Miscarriage is physically painful and mentally painful and I did not want to go thru it again. So a few days later I told my parents and sister, who by the way told me about a week or 2 before I told her I was pregnant that she was pregnant, funny ole world ain't it. But I asked them not to tell anyone. I did not post on social media, because I didn't want to have to deal with telling folks if something bad happened. I left it to my husband to tell his family, of course he sort of told them lol, he told his mom and dad, but failed to tell any of his brothers and sisters...sorry guys, that was totally on him lol. So I was pregnant!!! I continued to be involved with my derby league, and I was dancing still, until my belly got in the way. Photos of me were chest up only to keep the world from finding out. I told my closest friends about my pregnancy but that was it. I was cautiously optimistic. I didn't even buy an outfit for the little guy until I was 7 months pregnant, and didn't open any of the baby stuff I had until he came home. So that is why I didn't say anything, I was scared that he was going to be lost, like the last one, or that he was going to die shortly after birth because of the meds. One thing I must share that is so very important to me, was that on all those miscarriage forums I was on, the moms spoke of their angel babies. I didn't feel like I had an angel baby, I thought something was wrong with me, but when I turned up pregnant with Ender, something inside me just knew, it was the same exact spirit. If you are a believer, which I am, you can maybe understand, he is the same baby, he just had to wait a little longer.
Fast forward to his birth, they made me have him 2 weeks early because of my health, it wasn't bad, but I used to be extremely overweight and because of that had really bad blood pressure so they monitored me very closely. The birth was traumatic and fast, that's another blog too. And when he was born, he spend the first 39 hours of his life in the NICU because he couldn't breathe. He came out blue, and stayed that way until they inflated his lungs with positive pressure, he didn't need extra oxygen, just a little help getting his lungs to transition to breathing air. That is why I didn't post about him until the day after he was born, again, I didn't want to put it out there, just incase.
Ok, now I know some folks are mad, and you can be mad, but its my life, my decision, my body. I chose to deal with it the way I felt was best for me, and that is all that matters. But what is awesome, is that I have my sweet little Ender, and he is perfect, and happy, and I love him more than I ever thought I could.
Last year, after I graduated from college, a year ago today actually ^_^, Jacob and I got this hair brained idea to have another kid. So we thru caution to the wind and a couple of weeks later, I was pregnant. I was excited, apprehensive, nervous, etc etc...but I was also thinking, that something just wasn't quite right, I could not put my finger on it, but I knew something felt a little off. In fact when I told the head of the training committee of my roller derby league that I was going to be off skates, I asked her not to say anything to non-essential folks because, something felt weird. So I was being cautious, I only told the gals in my carpool because, I was riding with them, so obviously they would be all "ummm Gypsy why aren't you skating" even though all derby girls know that if a team mate suddenly shows up to practice off skates, it can only be one injury...the blessed 9 month injury ^_^. So I continued life, went to derby and even danced at the Mirage a time or two. We were getting ready to move in July, and we also had to drive out to Nebraska for Jacob's grandma's funeral. Well, on June 11, I started bleeding. We went to the ER, they did an ultrasound, and everything was fine, at that point, baby had a strong heart beat, but my placenta was bleeding. They told me it may stop, or it may be the beginning of a miscarriage. So I was scared. It was sad to me that I was going to possibly lose my baby. So we went home, and I laid down and watched "what to expect when you are expecting", and about half way thru the movie, I started having contractions, because that is what it is ladies and gents, contractions, not cramps or pain, its labour, and then there was A LOT of blood. I was bleeding for a few days before I could get into see the doctor again, they did another ultrasound, and my little baby that was alive and well just days before, was gone. All I saw was a screen with an empty womb. Now I have studied science, and I am religious, but neither one of those could prepare me for the sadness I felt when I realized what had happened to me. Logically I knew it was a "good" thing. Miscarriage is the body's way of aborting a pregnancy when there is something wrong with the early development of a fetus. I was about 7 weeks along when I had my miscarriage. But the emptiness I felt was beyond imaginable. But lucky for me, I have great friends, and a great family who helped me through it. I got up, and got on with my life. I was sad, my kids were sad because we had told them, but I was being strong for them and for me.
We packed and moved...and that is another story altogether that I AM NOT getting into right now lol.
We got to San Antonio and I met my new roller derby team, I started going to practice and everything was getting normal again. My body leveled out, really quickly actually, it was only a month after my miscarriage that things got back to normal. But August came, and my period did not......and I was like...WHAT is going on???? I was on all sorts of blogs and forums looking for information about why I would skip a period after a miscarriage. Finally the madness went on long enough, I told Jacob I thought I might be pregnant, I took a test...several actually. And they were all positive. And I was scared. I went to the doctor to get a prescription refilled a few days later, and I told him I suspected I was pregnant and he had me do a blood test. When I was at the pharmacy picking up the prescription the pharmacist handed me info about the meds that said in HUGE BOLD LETTERS....DO NOT TAKE WHILE PREGNANT. I had been taking this medicine for a while, I took it during the pregnancy I lost, and also during this current one. I asked the pharmacist what could possibly happen and he rattled off a list of things including miscarriage and birth defects. Well needless to say I didn't ever take another pill, and I began panicking that day.
I went to the OB and was seeing an attending physician, which in the army is a big deal, mostly you will see residents or midwives but because of the medication I had been on I saw an attending, and he was awesome, he and his resident were amazing. I saw them on a Tuesday, they did an ultrasound, and dated me at 6 weeks pregnant, I went back the next week, they did another ultrasound and the baby had grown ^_^ so they were optimistic that it would be fine. I however was not. I was scared to death. Miscarriage is physically painful and mentally painful and I did not want to go thru it again. So a few days later I told my parents and sister, who by the way told me about a week or 2 before I told her I was pregnant that she was pregnant, funny ole world ain't it. But I asked them not to tell anyone. I did not post on social media, because I didn't want to have to deal with telling folks if something bad happened. I left it to my husband to tell his family, of course he sort of told them lol, he told his mom and dad, but failed to tell any of his brothers and sisters...sorry guys, that was totally on him lol. So I was pregnant!!! I continued to be involved with my derby league, and I was dancing still, until my belly got in the way. Photos of me were chest up only to keep the world from finding out. I told my closest friends about my pregnancy but that was it. I was cautiously optimistic. I didn't even buy an outfit for the little guy until I was 7 months pregnant, and didn't open any of the baby stuff I had until he came home. So that is why I didn't say anything, I was scared that he was going to be lost, like the last one, or that he was going to die shortly after birth because of the meds. One thing I must share that is so very important to me, was that on all those miscarriage forums I was on, the moms spoke of their angel babies. I didn't feel like I had an angel baby, I thought something was wrong with me, but when I turned up pregnant with Ender, something inside me just knew, it was the same exact spirit. If you are a believer, which I am, you can maybe understand, he is the same baby, he just had to wait a little longer.
Fast forward to his birth, they made me have him 2 weeks early because of my health, it wasn't bad, but I used to be extremely overweight and because of that had really bad blood pressure so they monitored me very closely. The birth was traumatic and fast, that's another blog too. And when he was born, he spend the first 39 hours of his life in the NICU because he couldn't breathe. He came out blue, and stayed that way until they inflated his lungs with positive pressure, he didn't need extra oxygen, just a little help getting his lungs to transition to breathing air. That is why I didn't post about him until the day after he was born, again, I didn't want to put it out there, just incase.
Ok, now I know some folks are mad, and you can be mad, but its my life, my decision, my body. I chose to deal with it the way I felt was best for me, and that is all that matters. But what is awesome, is that I have my sweet little Ender, and he is perfect, and happy, and I love him more than I ever thought I could.
Saturday, March 29, 2014
Things I have learned in 2 weeks....
So I just finished my second full week of homeschooling my kids, and here is what I have learned.
1. I can't wait until next year when I have my "real" curriculum!!! I mean we do a lot, and they are definitely learning new things, not necessarily things that are above them, but things that have been pushed aside due to the annoyingly ridiculous standardized test. Because you know, all people learn the same way, at the same pace, and understand everything the same way at the same time -_-....right
2. Things that were once considered important in school, clearly are not even being taught anymore, like not even a little. Oddly enough the subjects that the kids and I spend the most time on together are language arts, and spelling skills. I am pretty sure its really important to know the parts of speech in your language, but I am SHOCKED at the amount of teaching I have had to do in this area. You see we just grabbed a year long curriculum and we are doing multiple lessons a day because they already know most of the stuff so we will be done when school lets out for the other kids. But I have had to teach them analogies, how to use a paper dictionary and thesaurus, proofreading (like slowing down so you can catch mistakes like spelling and punctuation etc), and how to identify letter patters that create vowel sounds.....what is going on in the public school system??? Anyway it really makes me glad I pulled them when I did.
3. Kids in public school, here anyway, eat lunch WAY TOO LATE!!!! Its no wonder that the kids are bouncing off the walls and crazy, off task, and losing their minds. They are hungry and thirsty. Who on earth can concentrate on anything if they are hungry, thirsty, or have to use the bathroom. I know I can't, I have to be hydrated to even think straight, let alone sit down and try to learn something. Gwen use to eat lunch at 11:45 am after eating breakfast at about 7:00 am, and Gavin would not eat until nearly 1:00 pm. So for Gwen that means, no food or water for almost 5 hours, and Gavin almost 6 hours with no food or water. My kids still eat around 7-7:30 but they have access to water whenever they want it, and don't have to beg to go to the bathroom, and by 11:00 am they are getting really antsy for not only a break but some food. So I give it to them, between 11-12 they eat and get to go away from school for a "brain break" usually one gets on the computer and the other plays in their room, or we all go outside and ride bikes when its not super gross out. And yes I let Gavin play minecraft during the day for about 20 min, you would be surprised how much 20 min of non school activity can recharge a brain. I get it, why doesn't the public school system get that??? Oh wait, they totally use to, until standardized test scores took precedence over actually learning.
4. We get thru 10 subjects a day, before school public school lets out here....WOW. Now I know that has A LOT to do with the fact that our ratio is 2:1 but still. I happen to know for a fact that in public schools right now, the kids are ALL DAY LONG PRACTICING FOR THE STUPID STANDARDIZED TEST!!! The teachers and administrators are pushing off learning for stressing these kids out on how to pass a test, because we all know one test totally 100% defines a year in a person's life.....SARCASM.....Whoever thought it would be a grand idea to base the amount of money and incentives a public school gets should be based on the best test scores was a fool. I am so glad I didn't get my degree in education, and I am so glad I didn't get hired to teach in this awful district. I would have been heartbroken to come into the public school system to find out that I could not teach the kids about Shakespeare and art, and script analysis, and acting ( I was applying for drama teacher jobs) and I had to teach to a test.
5. Dealing with a wandering mind is easy, when you can do it one on one. One of my kids gets distracted pretty easily, especially if I open the blinds while we are at the table doing school. But you know what, I asked, "why are you getting so distracted?', the answer "can you close the blinds? When they are open I get distracted." O_O are you kidding me, a child, knows what they need...NO WAY...SARCASM....Its amazing what you can learn from a child from a 2 minute conversation, and actually listening to them.
6. Conversation is SO IMPORTANT!!!!!! Not only conversation between teacher and student but also student and student. I do allow them to talk, when their conversation has to do with the lesson at hand, sometimes their lessons are the same, so they can bounce ideas off each other, and sometimes the just talk about stuff. Example: Social Studies yesterday, Gavin was learning about the Boston Tea Party, and Gwen was learning about The Star Spangled Banner. They talked back and forth a bit about both. Gwen asked about the Boston tea party, and I let Gavin answer her, Gavin asked about the national anthem, I let Gwen answer. When they got off that topic then I reigned them in back to their assignments. YAY FOR DISCUSSION!!!!! If there is one thing I miss from college, its sitting in a classroom or the green room just discussing things, movies, plays, art, editing, music, EVERYTHING!!!! I call this phenomenon, the foundation for creating thinkers and leaders, not followers ^_^
7. Foundations are the most important thing EVER. We all know that if a building doesn't have a stable foundation its going to crumble and fall. Well, these past 2 weeks I have learned that elementary school is a place to build foundations. They start really simple, and each year the same materials and subjects are used but expanded upon. You build up and fill in cracks each year in all the basic subjects, and guess what....by middle school they are ready to start building up frame work!!! That frame work, IMHO, gets built clear into high school, and then you start filling in the walls and floors and stuff. Then in college that is when the finishing touches go in, carpet, paint, light fixtures, decorative moldings etc...and then the building is ready for real life!!!! If your child chooses to go to college. If they want to attend a trade school, join the military, or skip college altogether (I hope not but they are their own people) then you can tailor high school to prepare them for whatever they need, because guess what....they have a strong foundation, and strong framework!!!! YAY I am so very excited about the prospect of being able to tailor my children's education to what they want to do when they "grow up".
Anyway these are just a few things I have observed these past 2 weeks. ^_^
1. I can't wait until next year when I have my "real" curriculum!!! I mean we do a lot, and they are definitely learning new things, not necessarily things that are above them, but things that have been pushed aside due to the annoyingly ridiculous standardized test. Because you know, all people learn the same way, at the same pace, and understand everything the same way at the same time -_-....right
2. Things that were once considered important in school, clearly are not even being taught anymore, like not even a little. Oddly enough the subjects that the kids and I spend the most time on together are language arts, and spelling skills. I am pretty sure its really important to know the parts of speech in your language, but I am SHOCKED at the amount of teaching I have had to do in this area. You see we just grabbed a year long curriculum and we are doing multiple lessons a day because they already know most of the stuff so we will be done when school lets out for the other kids. But I have had to teach them analogies, how to use a paper dictionary and thesaurus, proofreading (like slowing down so you can catch mistakes like spelling and punctuation etc), and how to identify letter patters that create vowel sounds.....what is going on in the public school system??? Anyway it really makes me glad I pulled them when I did.
3. Kids in public school, here anyway, eat lunch WAY TOO LATE!!!! Its no wonder that the kids are bouncing off the walls and crazy, off task, and losing their minds. They are hungry and thirsty. Who on earth can concentrate on anything if they are hungry, thirsty, or have to use the bathroom. I know I can't, I have to be hydrated to even think straight, let alone sit down and try to learn something. Gwen use to eat lunch at 11:45 am after eating breakfast at about 7:00 am, and Gavin would not eat until nearly 1:00 pm. So for Gwen that means, no food or water for almost 5 hours, and Gavin almost 6 hours with no food or water. My kids still eat around 7-7:30 but they have access to water whenever they want it, and don't have to beg to go to the bathroom, and by 11:00 am they are getting really antsy for not only a break but some food. So I give it to them, between 11-12 they eat and get to go away from school for a "brain break" usually one gets on the computer and the other plays in their room, or we all go outside and ride bikes when its not super gross out. And yes I let Gavin play minecraft during the day for about 20 min, you would be surprised how much 20 min of non school activity can recharge a brain. I get it, why doesn't the public school system get that??? Oh wait, they totally use to, until standardized test scores took precedence over actually learning.
4. We get thru 10 subjects a day, before school public school lets out here....WOW. Now I know that has A LOT to do with the fact that our ratio is 2:1 but still. I happen to know for a fact that in public schools right now, the kids are ALL DAY LONG PRACTICING FOR THE STUPID STANDARDIZED TEST!!! The teachers and administrators are pushing off learning for stressing these kids out on how to pass a test, because we all know one test totally 100% defines a year in a person's life.....SARCASM.....Whoever thought it would be a grand idea to base the amount of money and incentives a public school gets should be based on the best test scores was a fool. I am so glad I didn't get my degree in education, and I am so glad I didn't get hired to teach in this awful district. I would have been heartbroken to come into the public school system to find out that I could not teach the kids about Shakespeare and art, and script analysis, and acting ( I was applying for drama teacher jobs) and I had to teach to a test.
5. Dealing with a wandering mind is easy, when you can do it one on one. One of my kids gets distracted pretty easily, especially if I open the blinds while we are at the table doing school. But you know what, I asked, "why are you getting so distracted?', the answer "can you close the blinds? When they are open I get distracted." O_O are you kidding me, a child, knows what they need...NO WAY...SARCASM....Its amazing what you can learn from a child from a 2 minute conversation, and actually listening to them.
6. Conversation is SO IMPORTANT!!!!!! Not only conversation between teacher and student but also student and student. I do allow them to talk, when their conversation has to do with the lesson at hand, sometimes their lessons are the same, so they can bounce ideas off each other, and sometimes the just talk about stuff. Example: Social Studies yesterday, Gavin was learning about the Boston Tea Party, and Gwen was learning about The Star Spangled Banner. They talked back and forth a bit about both. Gwen asked about the Boston tea party, and I let Gavin answer her, Gavin asked about the national anthem, I let Gwen answer. When they got off that topic then I reigned them in back to their assignments. YAY FOR DISCUSSION!!!!! If there is one thing I miss from college, its sitting in a classroom or the green room just discussing things, movies, plays, art, editing, music, EVERYTHING!!!! I call this phenomenon, the foundation for creating thinkers and leaders, not followers ^_^
7. Foundations are the most important thing EVER. We all know that if a building doesn't have a stable foundation its going to crumble and fall. Well, these past 2 weeks I have learned that elementary school is a place to build foundations. They start really simple, and each year the same materials and subjects are used but expanded upon. You build up and fill in cracks each year in all the basic subjects, and guess what....by middle school they are ready to start building up frame work!!! That frame work, IMHO, gets built clear into high school, and then you start filling in the walls and floors and stuff. Then in college that is when the finishing touches go in, carpet, paint, light fixtures, decorative moldings etc...and then the building is ready for real life!!!! If your child chooses to go to college. If they want to attend a trade school, join the military, or skip college altogether (I hope not but they are their own people) then you can tailor high school to prepare them for whatever they need, because guess what....they have a strong foundation, and strong framework!!!! YAY I am so very excited about the prospect of being able to tailor my children's education to what they want to do when they "grow up".
Anyway these are just a few things I have observed these past 2 weeks. ^_^
Friday, March 21, 2014
Why'd I do it you ask?????
Ok so I have been raving and ranting and being annoyed on Facebook for quite a few weeks about the school system here in San Antonio. Well I finally had enough of it and pulled my kids out. Many of you want to know exactly why. Well I shall tell you. Allow me to unfold for you a tale that begins many moons ago, before we even moved out of GA. Ok so while we lived in GA my kids went to Joseph Martin Elementary School, I wasn't their number 1 fan, but I did love my kids teachers immensely, and I felt, for the most part, that the school had its crap together. Until the new crazy, micromanaging principal came along and messed a bunch of stuff up, then I was like...uummmm no thanks. But I was not in a place where I could homeschool my kids because I was trying to finish up college. I figured, its my last semester, I will let them finish out the year, then we are moving to Texas, and things will be better. So I did. The end of my semester came, followed by the end of the kids school year. A crap ton of home improvements later and we finally got to San Antonio. It was hot here, REALLY hot, like insanely hot, like I wanted to kill someone all the time hot. And there are people everywhere, and its miserable to do anything or go anywhere.
Anyway, school started, and it seemed ok. Gavin's teacher was sort of douchey and talked too much, just to hear himself talk. Gwen's teacher was a sweet awesome lady. Things were going well, then all the sudden they were not. Gavin was always talking about "I hate school" and "I don't want to be here" and "I want to go back to Georgia". Gwen was fine at first. Come to find out, Gavin was being bullied by this kid in his class, and he would just randomly punch him, and other kids in the face, then say he didn't, so he never got in trouble. So over and over again Gavin would tell me these things, finally one day it got to a point where enough was e-freaking-nough. I went in and spoke to the counselor, and what do you know. The next day something was finally done about it, oh and it was at this point I found out that the douchey teacher was gone, and Gavin had already had not one more, but 2 more teachers this year....this was in January BTW. So we are up to 3 teachers so far in 5 months.
Fast forward to March. Of course the bullying continued for Gavin, and he finally got another new teacher, this one stayed. But at this point the damage had already been done for him. He was over it, and begging to be homeschooled. So we all talked as a family and decided that we were going to do it next school year, that the kids would finish out this year and we would start fresh.
I began researching curriculum, talking to other homeschool moms and friends, and generally deciding what I wanted to do. There are so many options out there to homeschool your kids, but we decided on designing our own, based on Pearson Education Publications (I think that's what they are called). They have subjects by grade level and you can look at the books online before you purchase them to see if it is a book you want to use with your kids. Some subjects have many options, others not as much, but all have more than one. I knew I didn't want a religious based curriculum because I can make up my own religious curriculum with all the materials available from the church. And I don't want my kids to learn religion in science, I want them to learn religion AND science, so they can use their own minds and receive their own personal revelations, when the time comes, to truly decide how they think it all works. Anyway, so we have our basics, plus creative writing, religion, art, music, PE, computer, and a whole lot of other REALLY FREAKING AMAZING STUFF!!!! I mean my kids are going to be geniuses!!!! Best part is, all of it will cost less than $600 for them both for the year. Not bad I say!!! I knew I didn't want to deal with any of the online public schools because that is what I am trying to get away from, public schools, just thought I would add that in there ^_^.
So we have stuff picked out for next year, I have formatted my lesson plan book, attendance sheets, picked out when school will start and end with appropriate holidays in between so they kids have 180 days of instruction. Some states require you keep records like this, Texas is not one, but Georgia is, and we are going back there when we leave here, so it made sense to me to go ahead and start using it, and keeping records and portfolios on both of them. I found a website I can use to build transcripts, and report cards, and even one day order them a diploma for graduating from their mama's home school!!! That's not what will go on the document, but its cool that I can present them with a diploma at the end. What about state tests??? Well some states require homeschool kids to take them, Texas does not, but Georgia does. In Georgia homeschool kids take these tests in 3, 6, 9, and 12 grade. Am I worried about my kids passing them??? Not even a little, they will be learning so much above and beyond what the kids in public school are learning that they will do EXCELLENT and far surpass any score they would have gotten had they only been taught to take a test in public school.
We are ready!!! Then crap hit the fan flying a million miles an hour. Gwen had an issue, a BIG one that again, the administration was trying to brush under the rug. We reported it on Wednesday, they called me on Friday,"there is nothing we can do because the other student said it didn't happen." Gwen said, thru tears, "but it did happen." So I had my husband go up there. It was about 5 minutes after I got off the phone with the principal. He walked in, and the office staff did not acknowledge him, they were doing each others hair. When they finally did acknowledge him they said, "we don't know where she is and we are off the clock." (ARE YOU FREAKING KIDDING ME) So he left, when he got home we contacted a friend whose husband happens to be lawyer. He told us what to do. This all happened Friday before spring break.
Spring break I spent sleepless nights, worrying about one thing or another, what would happen when she went back, would this kid bother her again, who knows. Monday morning rolled around, and I went straight into the office and said, "so what are we going to do about this?" They were surprised because I was there, still trying to get something done. You see they figured I was one of those parents who just don't give a crap. HA no honey not me. I may also have mentioned I spoke to an attorney. ;-) Within MINUTES the school counselor was in there, why wasn't she involved before??? Too much hassle I guess. She interviewed Gwen again, and I was promised that the child who assaulted Gwen would also be interviewed again. The principal said she would call me and let me know what happened. Within 3 hours, she called me, told me the kid confessed, the police report was filed, and CPS notified. See what happens when you "lawyer up" ;-)!!!!
When I picked up my kids from school that day, it was for the last time. Gavin was so thrilled!!! Gwen's teacher was sad, Gwen was sad and happy at the same time, and I was sad for her teacher, she really is a sweet lady!!! I pulled them out!!! I wanted to wait until the school got off its lazy butt and did something about this situation first though. I left with a clear conscience, that I have done the right thing.
Gavin, Gwen, and I went straight to Lakeshore Learning store and picked up some stuff for our home school, and then to Barnes and Noble to grab some more stuff, and we hit the ground running Tuesday morning. And guess what, my kids do, scripture study, cursive handwriting, journal/creative writing, social studies, reading, spelling, math, language arts, writing, and science, every day!!! Its about 4 hours total of teaching/working time, with an hour in the middle for lunch and recess. So our day is about 5 hours from start to finish, but you know something....it doesn't feel like it, not at all.
Am I glad I did it, you betcha!!! Now excuse me, I have some kids who don't have hours of homework to hang out with for the evening!!! I think we will go see if Frozen is in the redbox!!!!
Anyway, school started, and it seemed ok. Gavin's teacher was sort of douchey and talked too much, just to hear himself talk. Gwen's teacher was a sweet awesome lady. Things were going well, then all the sudden they were not. Gavin was always talking about "I hate school" and "I don't want to be here" and "I want to go back to Georgia". Gwen was fine at first. Come to find out, Gavin was being bullied by this kid in his class, and he would just randomly punch him, and other kids in the face, then say he didn't, so he never got in trouble. So over and over again Gavin would tell me these things, finally one day it got to a point where enough was e-freaking-nough. I went in and spoke to the counselor, and what do you know. The next day something was finally done about it, oh and it was at this point I found out that the douchey teacher was gone, and Gavin had already had not one more, but 2 more teachers this year....this was in January BTW. So we are up to 3 teachers so far in 5 months.
Fast forward to March. Of course the bullying continued for Gavin, and he finally got another new teacher, this one stayed. But at this point the damage had already been done for him. He was over it, and begging to be homeschooled. So we all talked as a family and decided that we were going to do it next school year, that the kids would finish out this year and we would start fresh.
I began researching curriculum, talking to other homeschool moms and friends, and generally deciding what I wanted to do. There are so many options out there to homeschool your kids, but we decided on designing our own, based on Pearson Education Publications (I think that's what they are called). They have subjects by grade level and you can look at the books online before you purchase them to see if it is a book you want to use with your kids. Some subjects have many options, others not as much, but all have more than one. I knew I didn't want a religious based curriculum because I can make up my own religious curriculum with all the materials available from the church. And I don't want my kids to learn religion in science, I want them to learn religion AND science, so they can use their own minds and receive their own personal revelations, when the time comes, to truly decide how they think it all works. Anyway, so we have our basics, plus creative writing, religion, art, music, PE, computer, and a whole lot of other REALLY FREAKING AMAZING STUFF!!!! I mean my kids are going to be geniuses!!!! Best part is, all of it will cost less than $600 for them both for the year. Not bad I say!!! I knew I didn't want to deal with any of the online public schools because that is what I am trying to get away from, public schools, just thought I would add that in there ^_^.
So we have stuff picked out for next year, I have formatted my lesson plan book, attendance sheets, picked out when school will start and end with appropriate holidays in between so they kids have 180 days of instruction. Some states require you keep records like this, Texas is not one, but Georgia is, and we are going back there when we leave here, so it made sense to me to go ahead and start using it, and keeping records and portfolios on both of them. I found a website I can use to build transcripts, and report cards, and even one day order them a diploma for graduating from their mama's home school!!! That's not what will go on the document, but its cool that I can present them with a diploma at the end. What about state tests??? Well some states require homeschool kids to take them, Texas does not, but Georgia does. In Georgia homeschool kids take these tests in 3, 6, 9, and 12 grade. Am I worried about my kids passing them??? Not even a little, they will be learning so much above and beyond what the kids in public school are learning that they will do EXCELLENT and far surpass any score they would have gotten had they only been taught to take a test in public school.
We are ready!!! Then crap hit the fan flying a million miles an hour. Gwen had an issue, a BIG one that again, the administration was trying to brush under the rug. We reported it on Wednesday, they called me on Friday,"there is nothing we can do because the other student said it didn't happen." Gwen said, thru tears, "but it did happen." So I had my husband go up there. It was about 5 minutes after I got off the phone with the principal. He walked in, and the office staff did not acknowledge him, they were doing each others hair. When they finally did acknowledge him they said, "we don't know where she is and we are off the clock." (ARE YOU FREAKING KIDDING ME) So he left, when he got home we contacted a friend whose husband happens to be lawyer. He told us what to do. This all happened Friday before spring break.
Spring break I spent sleepless nights, worrying about one thing or another, what would happen when she went back, would this kid bother her again, who knows. Monday morning rolled around, and I went straight into the office and said, "so what are we going to do about this?" They were surprised because I was there, still trying to get something done. You see they figured I was one of those parents who just don't give a crap. HA no honey not me. I may also have mentioned I spoke to an attorney. ;-) Within MINUTES the school counselor was in there, why wasn't she involved before??? Too much hassle I guess. She interviewed Gwen again, and I was promised that the child who assaulted Gwen would also be interviewed again. The principal said she would call me and let me know what happened. Within 3 hours, she called me, told me the kid confessed, the police report was filed, and CPS notified. See what happens when you "lawyer up" ;-)!!!!
When I picked up my kids from school that day, it was for the last time. Gavin was so thrilled!!! Gwen's teacher was sad, Gwen was sad and happy at the same time, and I was sad for her teacher, she really is a sweet lady!!! I pulled them out!!! I wanted to wait until the school got off its lazy butt and did something about this situation first though. I left with a clear conscience, that I have done the right thing.
Gavin, Gwen, and I went straight to Lakeshore Learning store and picked up some stuff for our home school, and then to Barnes and Noble to grab some more stuff, and we hit the ground running Tuesday morning. And guess what, my kids do, scripture study, cursive handwriting, journal/creative writing, social studies, reading, spelling, math, language arts, writing, and science, every day!!! Its about 4 hours total of teaching/working time, with an hour in the middle for lunch and recess. So our day is about 5 hours from start to finish, but you know something....it doesn't feel like it, not at all.
Am I glad I did it, you betcha!!! Now excuse me, I have some kids who don't have hours of homework to hang out with for the evening!!! I think we will go see if Frozen is in the redbox!!!!
Sunday, February 24, 2013
True love
In the past 4 months I have had the opportunity to go thru some extremely gnarly trials. I say opportunity because since it started I am finally beginning to realize what it means and why trials are so important and necessary in this life we are here to live. You see I believe, with my whole soul, no I KNOW that I came to this earth from my Heavenly Father's presence to live a mortal life, having completely for forgotten about the world I came from, in order to learn, grow, and be tested so that I can return to my Heavenly Father with all the knowledge necessary for me to do whatever it is he wants me to do eternally. But for the mean time I am here and I am human, I make mistakes, and unfortunately sometimes I neglect my spirit and allow myself to stray from the right path. Not that I have committed any heinous sin, no it's not that at all. The point is, in these past months I have learned so much about what it means to be the best wife, mom, and spiritual leader for my children I can be. The application of this learning is slowly taking effect and everyday I add a new piece of knowledge or a new good habit to replace an old one. I have learned what true love is and I work everyday so that I can have it in my life. Sometimes life can be frustrating, and the trials we go thru make knock us on our butts. However, The Lord is always there to pick us up and he will always be there to pick us up, as long as we allow him into our life all the time. The point is, true love can only come from The Lord, so if you want true love, truly love The Lord and everything else will just fall into place.
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